Monday, 13 October 2008

WORLD'S GREATEST FILM

MY E-MAIL TO TOM

Just come up with an idea for an awesome film.

A company is about to go bust. However the struggling MD is determined to
stay operational and avoid insolvency. He owes money to loads of companies
who are about to force him out of business. In order to keep the bailiffs
away he comes up with an ingenious plan.

He hires a group of shady types to abduct the managers of these businesses,
i.e. the creditors. He then smuggles them on board the Sulaco, a ship
capable of traveling long distances through space. They are then jettisoned
to a distant planet known as LV426, A place of fierce weather and home to
the universe’s most terrible xenomorphing aliens, known for their ability to
gestate in the human chest, killing their host at birth.

These businessmen aren’t pushovers tho, they make the dragon’s den look like
“chicken nuggets” Marco from big brother 5. They take no shit. But tonight
they meet their match in…

ALIENS VERSUS CREDITORS!!!!!!

This time it’s war.

TOM’S E-MAIL REPLY

Ha ha – very good. Hows life at the insolvency service then? And what did you get up to at the week end? I went to Leigh again and then to Bolton with some mates and had the worst night out of my life. Spent too much, drank too much, didn’t get anywhere with any bird I spoke too. And to top it off, I had to pay 20 quid to get a taxi home. Fucking shite mate.

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