Dear John Letter

I'm not sure how to put this, I don't know how to say

What I'm thinking and I'm feeling without it sounding gay

You need to come to terms with this, I think because it's true,

No other way to say this, but there's something wrong with you.

You're determined in your efforts to stay inside my life

Inviting me on man-dates, like you're my man-wife.

I'm under the impression I'm the only man you know

Hence when the weekend comes around it's only me you phone.

At 5 pm right on the dot on every Friday evening,

I know exactly what it is that I will be receiving.

Your life is clearly empty time except for occupation

So now you want to take up mine, in essence what I'm statin'.

But all your efforts, I must say, are anything but fruitful,

'Cause now I've got to take a stand and hand it to you brutal.

Not trying to be an arsehole here, not like I've got a cob on

It's just that realistically we don't have much in common.

I tried to tell you how to go and open friendship circles

I tried to help you sort things out, it's not meant to be hurtful

My advice to you right now is meet some folks your own age

And as Fleetwood Mac would say, you can go your own way.