Matt Tuckey is a writer from Oldham, England. He covers celebrities, night life, Manchester, fitness, creative writing, social media, psychology and events. Some of this may, in some way, help others. Or maybe it'll just entertain you for a while.
Flew home. Much more fluid airport experience this time.
Great holiday. Spending time with the niece and second cousins was the highlight. Getting burned to shit was the lowlight. Really should have covered up more. Factor 50 and intermittent t shirt wearing wasn’t enough. Will try again next year. Lots of others on the plane had similar twat tans, so I’m not alone in my inability to manage UV.
I didn’t manage to do the submarine tour, snorkelling with turtles, jet skis, the monkey and parrot parks or the Viking ship cruise. 2026!
The last full day was a boat day. We walked down to the harbour in the morning to for a boat trip, out into the Mediterranean, so see dolphins and pilot whales, some incredibly beautiful mammals.
Pilot whale infants, the guide tells us, stay dependent for 15 years and tend to stay within their pod.
Which are these? Any experts?
Great views of the wildlife, but I just do not have the sea legs.
Thankfully my stomach settled once we were back on land, and we headed to La Cofradia for lunch and La Tasca 7 for tea.
Food in the town with the family. The House restaurant in a rustic Spanish backstreet served up garlic bread, penne arrabbiata, bacon and garlic tomatoes with chilli, and sugar and lemon crepes. Great food, shame about the African street entertainers blasting music and performing mediocre balancing acts.
My data roaming ran out at this point and Wi-Fi at Los Claveles was intermittent at best.
More beach. Managed to shift the hangover.
25/5 Sunday
Early evening myself and my parents found the meeting point for Tenerife Stars, a stargazing tour on Mount Teide.
Tour guide Ozzy, a trilingual and hugely passionate astronomer, took us on a coach up the mountain, and explained the history of the island beginning with the smashing of 2 tectonic plated millions of years ago, forcing the volcano upwards out of the seabed of the Mediterranean and forming what is now the third biggest volcano in the world. NASA, he tells us, calls it ‘The Gate to Heaven,’ the peak of which having risen up from inside the middle of the original volcano.
Eventually, the coach having wound its way through numerous high-lying rustic villages, we arrive at a vineyard with a giant wine press.
The tables are pre-laid and we sit, meet other tour guests, and the staff serve up some exquisite pumpkin soup, chicken and Canarian potatoes (new potatoes with a generous salt coating).
After an opportunity to eat and wander the grounds, we’re ushered back on the coach and we continue the climb.
Teide, Ozzy tells us, last erupted in 1798 (Google suggests it did again in 1909.) Star Wars and Star Trek have filmed there among the alien-looking spiky rocks. Listen to them crunch underfoot.
We reach twilight on the journey, and by the time we arrive at the viewing platform it’s already pitch black. It’s a clear night. There’s no moon, but the celestial hemisphere is in full view.
Ozzy describes the different stars and constellations, pointing them out in the sky with a laser pen. He explains how long it would theoretically take us to get there travelling at the speed of light. A couple of large telescopes have been set up on tripods on the cobbles, and we queue to look. Through the first, a distant galaxy, millions of light years away, appears as a streak of light as we’re looking at it side-on. At the second telescope, 2 visible white dots are actually a double star – 2 balls of gas burning in proximity. A constellation through the third telescope displays as a frosted glass effect – millions of stars against the void.
Food and hot drinks are available at this point.
Finally there’s a photo op against the cosmos. I paid for this one.
My mate Bini, a local DJ, moved out to Tenerife years ago and plays in the bars along the strip, so I managed to get out to see her with a couple of family members. Suffice to say, more cocktails followed. Great catchup and house music. Magic bar and Rejoyce bar later were the venues.
Quiet bar area. It’s no Magaluf. Not that I’ve been there since 2010.
