Sunday, 27 February 2011


Creative writing exercise.

Think of two characters. One of them wants something. For some reason, the other doesn’t want them to have it. Ten minutes. Go!

She pops up on Facebook Chat again.

Hi Matt.”

I sigh. Here we go again. I’m halfway through a status and I’ve forgotten what I was saying.

Hi Jackie.”


Quick, I think. Make an excuse.

Just sending out some writing,” I send. I show her a link to a site that’s showing some work of mine.

Good dat,” she sends. “Just going through a hard time atm”

Yeah,” I send. “Remember u sayin”

Husband in prison now,” she sends. “Thank God.”

Right,” I say, “glad to hear it.”

In all honesty, I’ve not seen her in twelve years. Call me a bastard, but I couldn’t care less. People with consistent angry status updates bore me.

Was just wonderin, would you go out with me?”

I hold my head in my hands. It’s only February and I’ve already had, what, two, three girls turn to a block of ice on me? I don’t need this shit as well.

Not to mention, I wouldn’t have gone there in school, let alone now.

Sorry hun, not my type.”

I hammer this as fast as I can, bang the return key, shut down my entire browser and walk away from the computer. I need a drink of water.

Should I have been nicer there? I think. Probably not. Women love a bastard. I just hope she tells her mates…

Yes, yes. The above is based on actual happenings. It fit the brief well. And yes, Jackie might try to sue me for defamation of character in the near future.

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