I'd like to congratulate you, Mike Keegan. You have written The Manchester Evening News' funniest article in a LONG time. For readers who may have missed it, here's the story of Lance Corporal Wayne O'Mahoney, who charged naked out of his house to apprehend a car thief.
What a guy. I can confirm the corporal's bravery as I used to live on that street back in '03/'04. Castle Irwell, Salford University's student digs, were right in the middle of the road. In fact, on an adjoining street, Seaford Road- that which connects the digs to the main uni campus- someone shot a firework at me from a side street. The cretin. A message to that person: you missed. Badly.
There was a lot of hatred between the locals and the students as they viewed us as the privileged ones with our own (largely useless) security guards and green space and sporting facilities and- critically- the money to go to uni in the first place. But we weren't the only ones falling victim to crime, and that still isn't the case now. It's good to see someone standing up to the scum.
The Lance Corporal clearly has a lot of balls- as I'm sure his eye-balling neighbours will confirm.