‘NEW YEAR OLD ME’ is written in block caps on the flip chart at the back of the vegan alcohol free bar Hinterland in the Northern Quarter. It’s the evening of the 7th of January. I've replicated the event on Manc Mates Meetup group although I'm not sure if any attendees from the site are here.
The rules are established:
CONFIDENTIALITY
MOVE FORWARD STEP BACK
SPEAK FROM I NOT WE
BE KIND
NO NEED TO FIX
EVERYTHING IS AN INVITATION
The first prompt on the board:
I’M HERE BECAUSE
We’re given a few minutes for automatic writing. I come up with this:
I’m here because I find the free writing exercises help me to put thoughts into words immediately, without dithering about how best to say it.
Also, I love the food. Famished once again. I’m here 20 minutes late because I went to a gym class and forgot a t shirt, and someone kept waffling at me in the changing rooms and I’m too fucking polite to cut them off. Why do I attract these people?!
The group organiser Fi tells us of the book ‘Wintering’ by Katherine May, detailing ‘times when we must retreat to care for and repair ourselves. May thoughtfully shows us how to come through these times with the wisdom of knowing that, like the seasons, our winters and summers are the ebb and flow of life.’
We find ourselves to be in ‘summer,’ going out socialising, or in ‘winter,’ wanting to shut ourselves off socially.
The next prompt is to pick one of the following and free-write:
REFLECTIONS ON 2025
I AM PROUD OF MYSELF FOR
I FELT MOST ALIVE WHEN
I’m most proud of myself for standing up for myself. Running a Meetup group requires resolve and confidence. In the last 12 months, I’ve had to send people out of bars, throw people out of Meetup groups digitally, teach people the problems of Zionism (or at least 1 massively drunk group member) and defend my own reputation over a particularly nasty Reddit thread.
I’ve tried to be a good colleague, Meetup host, friend and relative. I think I’ve done a good job, despite what some others have thought. I’ve dealt with all of this while dealing with a feeling that I’m being stabbed in the heart. It hasn’t been enough.
Next up we moved onto RESOLUTIONS. The flipchart read:
What am I lacking?
How can I transform?
Pressure
Shame
Comparison
Self Criticism
Succeed / fail
INTENTIONS
Rooted in relationships with ourselves
Shapes out conditions
Directional
Flexible
Values-based
Not outcome focused
Fi describes how, on Solstice (21st last month) she would write her intentions on separate slips of paper, burn all but one without knowing which, and the one she’s left with she uses as her challenge for the year.
Next up on the board, a series of words:
ENOUGH
REST
BELONGING
FOCUS
BOUNDARIES
GROUNDING
SPACE
PATIENCE
MOVEMENT
LAUGHTER
CLARITY
FRIENDSHIP
PLAY/FUN
ENERGY
Below that, some prompts to which we can incorporate what’s above
1) IF I BRING MORE ____ TO 2026 MY LIFE WOULD
2) GET CREATIVE – PICK 3 WORDS, WRITE A POEM
3) DOODLE / DRAW
I come up with this poem:
The space between a quiet cafe and a rave
A hospital maternity unit and a grave
A city centre and a satellite town
No time for rest if you’re travelling down
What would be best, for the time you have left?
Feeling dismayed, in pain or bereft?
The organiser hits the gong at this point, and she told us of a ‘Create and Play’ themed event happening next month, involving collage and Lego.
The final flipchart page features 2 prompts to take away if we like:
THIS YEAR I’D LIKE TO NURTURE
SOMETHING I WANT TO MAKE MORE ROOM FOR
Journal club returns 4th February.
