Anthems of House

I went back in time last weekend. Figuratively. Before housing the banality of business network meetings and car boot sales, Bowlers in Trafford Park was one of the most prolific clubs in the north of England. I was too young to go in its prime, but this man seems to have been a regular attendee and has plenty of retrospective info on the 90s club scene that Bowlers was so heavily a part of.

For one night, on the 26^th October, Bowlers- now Bowlers Exhibition Centre- reopened as a club for History of House Music, a retrospective night of house classics. Look at the names on that line-up!

 

  

I paid £45 for a highly sought-after VIP ticket, gaining access to the VIP lounge, where DJ Bini shared the decks with Si Forestiero, Jason Herd and his partner-in-crime Jon Fitz (Herd ‘n’ Fitz had a hit with I Just Can’t Get Enough in 2004).

We were treated to a brilliant live PA by Freemasons front-woman Katherine Ellis.

“Is that Inner City leaving the building?” she mocked. 
 

The Main hall of Bowlers is absolutely huge, with a 4,500 capacity and- on this night- a full-width stage with an immense LCD backdrop. The event was far from a sellout, though, and the venue had plenty of space at the back.

 As it happens, I did see Inner City, who performed their hits Big Fun, Pennies from Heaven and Good Life.

Here's DJ Adam Guy's  set

Vid 1

Vid 2

I suppose the problem with a retro night like this is that the people who go clubbing are too young to remember the era the Anthems night is celebrating, yet the people who ARE old enough are settled down and have other interests than going clubbing. That could be the reason the night had low numbers. The popularity of old-skool house music amongst 20-somethings could also explain the surprisingly young clientele. The majority of people there fit the demographic of the average clubber in any other venue- 18-25 year-olds, which says something about contemporary dance music.


There were a few signs that rave culture was still alive and well- laser shows, fire-breathers, stilt-walkers, axle-grinders, a few topless blokes scattered about, the smell of weed hanging in the air, a few delirious faces and a handful of crazy outfits (but it WAS Halloween). Oh, and this bloke:

I suspected his own zaniness floored him rather than any ingested remedy, and it didn't look like it had kicked off at all. I definitely didn't see any fights all night.

I had a great night and I got to see friends, enjoy performances, and dance my arse off. I think I missed a few PAs and DJ sets by holing myself up in VIP for too long, one drawback to paying for privileges. I suspect, though, that the Bowlers of the 90s era- the period that the night was celebrating- would have felt friendlier and more unifying. I mean, how many people were dancing in those videos? Only the VIP crowd! Perhaps the cliché that clubbers in the 90s didn't realise how good they had it isn't just a cliché. I was too young to know, but I gather the 90s club scene had a whole lot of love that can't be replicated by simply bringing back the acts and DJs.

But it was a damned good effort.

Three Strikes: Week 48

This weeks achievements: 

I've met Paralympic medallist David Weir. 

On Saturday I probably spent more time driving in one day than I have in any other day, and with the torrential downpour the north-west saw this weekend, I can treat that as an achievement of sorts... 

I've driven from Oldham to Cleethorpes for a wedding, then from there to Trafford Park for Anthems of House Music, a night of dance classics in an exhibition centre that was, at one time, one of the biggest clubs in the country in its day. Full post to follow.

Gents' mag Esquire chose my tweet for their Reader's Nightmares article! It was an online piece only, but I'm mighty chuffed!

At the gym, however, I could hardly get onto any of the machines I wanted to. I'm going to have to get my ass out of bed VERY early to use them before work, when only the forty-something-year-old women come in to chat on the treadmills. I went in this morning after I'd got home at about 4am! I'd had about 7 hours sleep and got in as quick as I could, but the lat pulldown and the benches were STILL being used! This is what happens when you spend £19.50 a month on a membership, though- you're joining a tiny, overcrowded gym with a handful of machines.

I actually improved on something at the gym, breaking a 6-week run of not making any new records. Cable crunch, using the V-shaped handle bar, saw a 1-notch improvement after a 14-month slump. It's a stomach exercise, so something I've never stopped working on. It does affect the wrist muscles more than the stomach, though, so I'll be more likely to look like Popeye than have a six-pack if I keep at it. As few as 5 strikes left on the project. Was hoping I could stretch it to 52 weeks- it'll be a miracle if that happens.

Profanity in Kids' Movies

The Jungle Book (Won't embed, for some pathetic reason)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pkHyRTlXwkY

Shit, yeah, you better had.

Transformers: The Movie

Shit, I dunno! What ARE you gonna do?!

The Twitches

What the FUCK are “twitches”?

Enchanted

Angry driver at 0:28...

I wonder if these films made it on to TV uncut. Well, kids hear it all in the playground anyway, right? Oh, and by the way- given that these lines exist in U-rated movies, can we now stop cutting swear words out of 18-rated films that are shown AFTER the watershed on TV?

Are there any other U-rated movies with swearing in?

Meeting David Weir

Last night I met six-time gold-winning Paralympic champion David Weir, who was signing copies of his autobiography Weirwolf.

With the event happening on a weeknight at 6pm, the Deansgate branch of Waterstones was quiet. I asked a bookseller what was happening.

“He's just having a cup of tea in the café at the moment,” she said. “We're just waiting for it to get a little busier.” She pointed to a short queue forming near a table. It's a shame, really, as watching Weir compete and win, and accept four gold medals at last year's Paralympics, was electrifying. You'd think the queue would go around the block.

I really enjoyed his races last year, and told him so when I met him. What a ledge!

Going Monosyllabic

Can you write a 100-word story using words with only one syllable? This was our challenge some months ago at Writers Connect.

This isn’t necessarily a timed exercise- just keep it incredibly concise. I went way over the word mark, but I kept the story monosyllabic. Many people didn’t manage that.

It also helps if you have a starting point- maybe a theme or first word to begin the story with. We didn’t though, so I had to use literally what was in front of me. Hence how ridiculous it gets.

I ate the chip off the plate. It was good. I left the peas, though.

“What’s in the pot of sauce?” asked John.

“Don’t know,” I said. “Some kind of crème.”

The word “crème” was a code word for the Dark Prince. He soared up from the ground, roared, and smashed the plate. His mouth, a cave of sharp knives, foamed and steamed. “Who stole my chip?” he asked, loud and firm.

The group’s eyes moved to me. I burped.

The beast of a man gripped me by the throat. “That was MY chip,” he roared, eyes red and raw. “What will you do to please me now?” he said.

I saw my days in hell with no end. In fear, I puked up on the plate, warm and moist.

The Dark Prince scraped up the mush and ate it whole and warm.

“Thanks,” he said. “And… don’t use that word please.”

“What word?”

“Crème,” he said, and the ghouls poured from his lair.

“Aw, no!”

They clawed him deep back in the Earth.

So. Quite clunky and ridiculous (Why would the devil have a problem being taken to hell? Isn’t that where he’d be at home?), but I managed it. You’d be surprised how many people accidentally slipped in a few multi-syllabic words. Also, I took the word count to 174. Guessing how many words I’ve written is impossible for me- I need the word processor to guide me on that. Start with a theme and stick to a time rather than word count, and a monosyllabic challenge could be a really inventive exercise.

Three Strikes: Week 47

Had a fucking nightmare this week with buying a ticket to a club night thatI then realised I couldn't go to due to a wedding. I'd have stayed over and already had booked the hotel room. Tried to sell the ticket. Had no serious buyers. Then realised I was losing money whichever way I turned, and that the wedding venue wasn't actually all that far from the club. I'd be at the wedding all day, so I'm sure they wouldn't mind if I left at night. The club won't even get busy 'til after midnight. I've just got a bit of a mission driving from one place to the other. I'll manage though.

So re the previous blog post: the ticket isn't for sale any more and I am going to one of the biggest clubbing nights of the year!

On the issue of nightmares: earlier this week, gent's lifestyle magazine Esquire were asking us to tweet them our scariest dreams. I mentioned one that had stuck in my mind for over a decade- that I was about to be beheaded in the college car park for selling drugs. I have never sold drugs. I got a favourite and a thanks from them. Woop woop!

And on the theme of social media, comedy website The Poke asked over Twitter for our #bruciefilms, film posters involving Bruce Forsyth. As I'm using the pre-installed Paint application and not a £200 Quark-type graphics package, this is all I could manage:

I apologise for that.

No PBs at the gym.

Anthems of House VIP Ticket for Sale

A week today sees one of the biggest classic house music nights in history take place at the iconic Bowlers Exhibition Centre in Trafford Park. Anthems of House looks to be a spectacular, memorable and stunning event, featuring DJs like Dave Pearce, Allister Whitehead and Stu Allen. Expect also unmissable, rare PAs from 90s dance music legends Inner City, Shades of Rhythm and Liquid.

And I can't go. I'm fucking devastated. HOWEVER: I didn't realise that until I'd already bought a VIP ticket. I'm now lumbered with an incredibly rare pass that allows fast-track entry, access to the VIP room and bar, the main area VIP stage, a set-times event lanyard and the VIP toilets.

I spent £45 on this, before I properly checked my calendar. I just need someone to take it off me. You've got until next Friday night to buy it off me. For everything that you'll experience, £45 is an absolute bargain. I can't believe nobody's taken it off me already.

If you want it, get in touch FAST. My Facebook is here. My Twitter is here.